Thursday, December 24, 2009

Christmas Eve Wishes

I can't believe it has been four weeks since our last post! Life remains busy, and blessed. Today is our birthday and we have so much to be thankful for - our friends, our family, our health - the simple fact that we have the financial resources to continue our pursuit for a family. Steve awoke me this morning as he does every morning - by laying my robe at my feet, kissing me and telling me he loves me, but today he added 'Happy Birthday!' - to which I replied the same. He is the love of my life and thank God I am the love of his. My mom arrives from Texas this evening for a long stay and I couldn't be more excited to see her. We haven't seen her since May so this visit is long overdue.

We are cycling again now - with our third egg donor - using the same surrogate from cycle #2. We really want this to work for this particular surrogate and her family as much as we want it for ourselves. Embryo transfer should be in about 3 weeks with pregnancy test at the end of January. We are waiting for the suppression scan results which will tell us how our donor is doing - we went with a first time donor because we just felt good about her. If there is one thing that is evident, there is no definitive way to predict the success of a, we went with the one with the big brown eyes, beautiful smile and bone structure that had 'confidence' spelled out from ear to ear. The egg donor selection process has been the toughest part of this journey - at least for me. Falling in love with the idea of these women being our baby's biological mother and then having to let go of that notion and fall in love all over again, and now again - this has been challenging.

For all those, like us, in pursuit of parenthood - a short story of inspiration. My dear friend Tandy, whom I've known for over 20 years, called me this week. Her and her husband are spending their first Christmas with their adopted son Jake - he was born in July of this year through an open adoption. A quick run down of their 10+ year journey to Jake: 8 failed IVF self cycles and multiple miscarriages, followed by 2 donor egg cycles including one miscarriage and three attempts with donor eggs and surrogacy (all negative). Then, last fall, they were to adopt a child through an open adoption. The baby was born, given to them and they returned to their hotel to begin the state mandated, 7 day 'waiting period' - during which time the birth mother can 'change her mind' - which she did. On day 2, they drove the baby back to the birth mother and returned home to Dallas, devastated. Then, finally, this past July, Jake arrived. Her call to me was to tell us that we 'should never give up on our dream'.

I love following all our fellow bloggers' stories - some have news coming soon (fingers crossed, you know who you are) - others have crossed into the second or third trimester! Your stories keep our dreams alive. Thank God for this network of cyber-support. We all have our stories - some filled with more drama, some with less - but, the one thing that is consistent is that those with babies are the ones who were relentless in their pursuit. Good luck again to all waiting for a 'positive'. We are sending you love and baby dust.

Merry Christmas to all of you and best wishes for a fabulous 2010!

Terry and Steve