Thursday, August 26, 2010

Dad, Daddy, Papa?

We have our baby names, the nursery is done, our plane tickets are purchased - we are pretty much ready to go and get our kids!  The one thing we haven't decided is what we want them to call us.  The thing is this, when talking to a baby, you often (or at least we do with our dogs) refer to yourself in the first person - 'daddy loves you' - 'can you smile for papa?' - 'dad wants you to stop crying'.  Yes, I know you can't really control what your kids call you - as toddlers or as they grow up.  I have an Aunt Choo Choo (her name is Shirley) and I still call her that to this day!  Not sure how I got from Aunt Shirley to Aunt Choo Choo.  So, on the one hand, why worry about it - on the other hand, my obsessive nature wants this detail ironed out.  Thoughts anyone?  We talked about Daddy and Daddy T.  We are pretty sure Steve will be Daddy...he will be the primary caregiver. Papa sounds so formal.

I have been out of town on business much of the past two weeks.  Last weekend I was in LA and I developed a bad case of the 'I miss LA blues'.  It was 67 degrees at night (19 Celsius) - every night.  We had dinner outside with the air so still and so comfortable.  Just amazing.  I went through our Sunday 'routine' - gym, mass, lunch - but Steve wasn't there with me so it all felt so odd.  I text him 'I miss LA' and he text back 'just think about raising the kids here in Dallas'.  We moved primarily because we decided that raising kids in LA was not for us.  The fact is, Texas is a wonderful place and when I wrote a few posts back about leaving my heart there, it was true.  Texas gets a bad wrap.  Yes, Texas did produce the worst president in our lifetime.  Yes, Texas does have more than its share of conservative, absurd politicians and hypocritical, religious zealots.  Yes, it is hotter than hell in the summer.  But...and this is a big, important BUT...people are genuinely nice.  Case in point - a couple of weekends back, I was sitting at a stop light, waiting to turn left at a red arrow - the light turned from red to green and we sat there - the car at the light wasn't moving - the car in front of me and behind me sat quietly - 10 seconds later the light turned red.  What was odd about this?  NOONE BLEW THEIR HORNS!  It was oddly shocking.  In LA, not only would there have been an onslaught of honking horns, there is a strong likelihood that someone would have gone over to the driver's window and pulled the person from their car and beat them - OK, I exaggerate - but, there would have been honking, screaming and lots of waving middle fingers.  This is one example.  We made the right decision for us and for the kids - and we saw my parents more in one month than we had typically seen them in a year's time.  There is an enormous gay community in Texas, and particularly in Dallas - I have so many friends from over the years there, so there is no lack of 'community'.  I feel our stress level going down and I am quite certain we have added 10 years to our life.  Life in Dallas is - simply put - Easy. 

We received scans today and a report from Dr S.  The larger twin is up to 2167g (4.8 lbs) and the smaller one 1974g (4.4 lbs).  No signs of labor and we are 34.5 weeks.  We arrive in Delhi on Sept 7th - that is about a week and a half from now.  I fly home from the last leg of my trip tomorrow and will be home all next week in the event we get a call and need to leave for India earlier than planned.  I can't wait to meet these kids!!!!

Terry (and Steve)

17 comments:

Edward said...

34.5 weeks!!!! That's great and good healthy weights! STAY PUT TWINS!!! Daddy/Papa/TBD are their way!

I'm happy for you to have (re)found your home in Texas. There is great value in being near family, even if the air con bill is through the roof.

We'll be thinking of you guys in the coming weeks. BEST wishes!

tjudle said...

It's all so very, very exciting! I can't wait for you to meet your kids, either, Papa! :)

Will and Michael said...

All getting very close. Glad all still progressing so well.

We often think about what we will be called and still have not come up with anything for certain. I am sure when our little ones can talk they will pick perfect names that will stick.

GOOD LUCK!!!

jojo said...

We find ourselves calling Tim Dadda sometimes. It's cute...

Oh, not long now! I can't wait for you guys to become daddies/pappas/daddas.

xxx

Mandy said...

OMG! I cant wait for u guys to meet your babies, and whatever they call u will be absolutely ADORABLE! They have their own way of making you into their puppet..lol.

Oh and in Jersey, someone at the red light would have come out and probably did some damage..lol, ME, just kidding. That is so refreshing to have no one honk, what a concept.Glad you guys made that wonderful choice.

Jeff and Kevin said...

I don't think it would be weird to both be called daddy. Soon enough the kiddos will decide what they want your name to be. They'll figure it out.
Congrats - you must be so excited!

Mike and Mike said...

We fell back on the ethnic card, e.g., me being half Chinese. We did consider Papa...but the thought of being called "pops" as they got older sent chills down my spine...too Happy Days for me. How about Daddy and Papa with the accent on the last a? Too pretentious? Or Father? Luke...I am your Father...

As for TX, it most certainly has it's advantages. Cost of living and definitely the people are genuinely friendly. Maybe if we had been in Austin or Dallas instead of San Antonio we would have considered staying. But probably not. The East Coast is where the sirens called us home...along with the honking, finger waving, and people who don't know how to turn their damn signal light on!

Todd said...

Great update! I can't believe how close you're getting!

Life in the large cities in Texas belies the stereotypes so many have about the state. Neither of us have deep roots in Houston but for our very "non-traditional" family it has been a welcoming home for us. Our second parent adoptions of each set of twins have gone VERY smooth (and fast)!

Intended Parents said...

You're almost there Daddies!

Amber and Brian said...

Its so exciting to think everything is going so perfectly well. Hopefully the twins will cooperate and wait until you arrive in India. Try to get as much sleep as possible now!

Amani (Meg) said...

Daddy and Dadda? Daddy T sounds like a rap name, thought that's not a bad thing. Is there a cultural background in either family where you could adopt the foreign name for daddy - eg. My sister's husband is Russian, and grandma is Baba, grandpa is Jedda, and on our side nanny and Grandpa.

Am hanging out to see your twins safe in your arms!!!!

Fredrik said...

We have safely arrived in Delhi and are waiting for..... and some company!

Hope they decied to stay for 10 more days!

Fredrik and Robert

jojo said...

Or how about Aba? It's the Indian word for Dad. xxx

Terry & Steve said...

Thanks for all the great comments! Jojo, we like Aba and had even talked about it this weekend. PS - that apartment you took in Delhi is fabulous! I am slightly concerned about the one week picked but it is 10 minutes walk to SCI/Phoenix which means avoiding the traffic :)

Now we are counting days not weeks! OMG.

coco said...

there's something so precious about hearing and saying the word Daddy, like a gift from the heavens. i vote for daddy. my husband will often say, "i'm daddy daddy mitchell" like saying it twice re-enforces how absolutely blessed we are. no honking horns, you're definitely not in nyc where people will honk their horns before the light changes, just in case you were relaxing behind the wheel.
i kind-of have the same dilimma; should we live in the condo on the busiest avenue in the neighborhood but has a private penthouse roof top or move to the one two blocks over where it is near the park, building with more amenities and so quiet you can hear a pin drop? next stop, new delhi

jilliebean said...

We call ourselves "mommy" and "mama", but the 9 month old can only say "mama" and we know who he wants when he says it. Maybe he'll get it right when he's older, but right now we don't care. Hearing him say mama is the sweetest thing ever!

We live in the Panhandle of Texas and it really does bite as far as how people look at us, but we can't let it bother us. We just go on about our business. I'm quick to tell people who stare or who are nasty to us that if they don't like it, don't look. Don't be around us. It's that simple!

Stay put twins!! 34.5 weeks is amazing! Can't wait for you to see them!

Christy said...

Love and prayers. Love and prayers. I'm so excited for you both!!!!