No News IS Good News

And I have virtually no patience - I want everything now - immediate gratification - if it's not in stock, I have no intention of ordering it. It drives Steve crazy. If I must order it, I will always pay for overnight shipping. Just one little burden I bare in life. So, let me tell you how crazy the communication with India makes me - OMG!!! I knew it going in and I experienced the communication lags during the 'courtship' with the clinic and I read about it and continue to read about it on other blogs and forum boards. Several people have written that 'no news is good news' as it relates to getting updates from the clinic...and I think that is a very powerful statement, mindset and way of 'Indian, surrogate, pregnant life'!

For all of you out there with limited knowledge about IVF or the reproductive process in general, there are a series of hurdles - most critically in the first 12 weeks. The first is the Blood Hcg level tests - the first one is generally done at 14 days following egg retrieval and this tells you whether or not you are pregnant. It is essentially testing for an elevation in one particular female hormone. This hormone concentration in the blood should double every 48-72 hours in the first 12 weeks of pregnancy. I could write an entire page on this topic, but let me just get to the point. So, there are vast ranges of 'normal' depending upon the week of gestation. Everyone insists the value itself (how high or low the number) is not significant, but the doubling of the value every 48-72 hours (or not doubling every 48-72 hours) is the earliest indicator of either a successful pregnancy or a potential miscarriage.

First Blood Hcg (called 'beta') @ 14 days past egg retrieval = 31 (normal range 16-156)
Second 'Beta' @ 17 days past egg retrieval = 61 (essentially doubled in 72 hours, so OK, barely)

INSERT my psychosis here. I went to this awful, crazy place I tend to go when I cannot control an outcome and it was ugly. We were to wait 4 days for the next update. Ugh. I even went so far as to email Rotunda on Sunday to confirm if we should expect the report by email on Monday morning, Tuesday morning or Wednesday morning. Prompt reply by one of the docs on Sunday afternoon - I was told to expect the report via email on Tuesday morning. So, I was thrilled when Tuesday morning finally arrived. This was a pretty critical benchmark.

No email arrived on Tuesday - I emailed them asking if there was a problem. No response.
No email arrived on Wednesday - I emailed them asking if there was a problem. No response.

The emailed report arrived, finally, on Thursday morning (today).
Third 'Beta' @ 21 days past egg retrieval = 392 (doubled almost 3 times in 4 days, very nice improvement, sigh of relief)

This blood was drawn on Monday of this week and the fourth test will be performed tomorrow, Friday. We are looking for the number to hopefully be at least 1500, at which time they will schedule the first ultrasound. This will verify that the embryo is actually attached in the uterine wall (rather than tubal) and that there is a yolk sac and fetal 'pole'. This will tell us if the pregnancy is viable - huge hurdle.

So, back to this communication 'problem'. It 'is what it is' - and I write this to share with anyone heading down this road with Indian Surrogacy. The clinics are busy - beyond busy - and they simply struggle to keep you informed. I honestly believe they are excellent practitioners of reproductive medicine, but could use a business manager! I saw first hand the sheer numbers of people coming thru the doors - I honestly don't know how they even manage to deliver the service levels that exist today. I can only imagine the number of emails that must go unanswered. I often times get emails from Dr Kaushal or Dr Gouri at 2 or 3am (India time)...often times.

So, I am quite certain the docs 'manage by exception' - meaning they deal with the most critical communications - often problems - first and then get to anything else that time allows. That is the only conclusion to draw. My neurosis over a blood test report was not the most pressing issue - keeping in mind one of their clients lost their twins this weekend at 24 weeks - which has saddened the entire Indian Surrogacy community.

'No news really is GOOD news'. I must remember that for the next eight months or else I might just lose it! So, I vow to repeat this to myself - and pray that the phone does NOT ring.

As an aside - I could have 'Skyped' them and spoken to a live person - and that was the plan should I have awoke to no email today - but I am reserving that right for a full flegded panic attack.